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So how should we respond to the dominant dating culture? Giving up Christian values and virtue is hardly an option. Some try to “Christianize” dating by embracing a softer approach that doesn’t break outright with the questionable norms commonly associated with dating but rather settles for modifying them a bit. (“Let’s just be careful not to be too selfish!”) Still others may become so discouraged or cynical that for a time they become reclusive or avoid the other gender to the greatest extent possible.

Many long to find a different approach to relationships, but how do we go about this? Although it is not easy to part with a me-first mentality, a good starting point is to apply the Golden Rule—“love your neighbor as yourself”—without regard to gender.